I will..Teach for India

She was lost, confused, frustrated, irritated, everything negative that can possibly effect an individual was effecting her. She had spent 3 precious years and graduated, making everyone around her happy. But here she was, she had completed 9 months of her work and there was nothing she had learnt, nothing that had made her happy. She would eat blankly, meet friends and yap about work, and sleep praying somehow she finds a valid reason not to go to office the next day. This frustration would only result in more frustration and nothing else. Happens with most of us, right? So many people end up doing something they would never want to do, all their life.

She always wanted to teach. In-fact her long term plan was taking up part time teaching after earning substantially experience. Suddenly one of her friends, who knew about her love for teaching, asked her to apply for Teach for India fellowship, one day before the deadline. She didn’t think twice and here she is, writing this down, as she is still digesting the fact that she cracked the long process of the selection.

My mom is a teacher. I have heard her complain about Indian Education System. I had a client, who is a Developmental Pediatrician, Dr. Anjana Thadhani, who also owns an NGO, and is a child rights activist too. Several times, in meetings, I have heard her talk about RTE and how it has not done any good to the education system. I somehow connect with the TFI vision and mission, and I think everyone will, once they know the condition and understand the value of education. But thinking, talking, discussing, understanding, and complaining are definitely not the ways we can do anything and I decided to take up this fellowship.

My parents are really cool. They never forced me to take up engineering or get married at the age of 21. They trusted me, and kept me away from home since I was as young as 15. Keeping your daughter away from home for 6 long years isn't’t easy. They did not question me about TFI, until I sat with them to sign my commitment letter. All that they asked me was a simple question, “Are you sure?” They did not repeat the question after my firm “Yes”. But somehow I sense they are not as happy, as overwhelmed, as excited as I am. Maybe with time, they will accept it wholeheartedly.

My question is quite simple. We talk about positivity. Everyone talks about positivity. When we do something good for the people who deserve it, when we give them happiness with whatever we can, shouldn’t we expect that the outcome will be fabulous? Shouldn't we think that we will only reflect positivity? Service to man is service to God, they say, so why do we worry when we give up on good jobs, good opportunities (good here means money and experience) and invest our 2 years in doing something good to others? God is there, right? We believe in the power that we haven’t seen, but we do not believe in ourselves, our power to change something, very little in the society we crib about day in and day out. Musicians, Artists, Actors, each one of them entertain you, make you laugh, cry, feel, right? When you come home frustrated after work, that music makes me calm down, doesn't it? Then why are all these careers not encouraged as much as other careers are.

People will come, ask me and my family 100 questions, what? Why? But she studied advertising no? I’m sure she must have not got a good job. Should it matter to me? I will be walking in the classroom each morning, smiling, enthusiastic, in the expectation that we (me and my students) will learn together the lessons of life. I will sleep in the nights planning how my next day will be. I will happily plan sometime out with family and friends, probably counselling them about their jobs and discussing how to bring change. I’m happy, because there is no leadership like being a teacher, and there no noble profession than being a provider of knowledge and learning.

Go on, O traveler!

How does it feel to be different? Having a different set of ideas, and standing by those ideas always? How does it feel to be considered as an outcast? Because you don’t know what you want to become in life?

He woke up asking such questions to himself each day. He likes to spend hours in his bathroom, with the tap on, listening to the drops hitting the water in the bucket. He is lost in his own thoughts most of the times, and fears that his thoughts will kill him someday. He loves being around people and discussing, but he finds peace in being alone in the company of some music or his thoughts alone. He wants to give up on everything and hit the road, with or without music, because what he believes is that world is music. There is constantly music around us, we fail to acknowledge it, probably because man has stopped imagining all the beautiful things, and has lost the ability to perceive things as they are, without judging them.

He says, Go on, O traveler. Life is a car and time its wheels. He wants to drive his car, but people often pull and push, hit and run, turn it around and kick it hard. No, that does not affect him, he is still on the driver’s seat. He loves colors, but somehow black and white appeals to him more than anything else. He wants to go back in time, and experience the nature at its best. Maybe be a nomad for a while. He believes that thoughts, thoughts alone are the best friend of man. There is high that the air gives us. He does not blame the world. He feels sad for the people, because most of them are in a bad trip and they don’t know how to enjoy that bad trip.

He has learned the art of enjoying the bad trip and converting it into a good one when he feels like. He hasn't perfected it, but his thoughts often give him confidence and hope. He likes being around his thoughts, he talks to his thoughts, argues, discuss and they together come up with a conclusion. He is just like everyone, with a different set of ideas and thoughts, and that makes him what he is. He falls in love, eats, dances, talks, meets people but everything with a different perspective in his mind. It’s his soul that talks, he chooses not to use his brains when it is not needed. He loves himself, and so he loves his life, he loves everything that God has created, because he believes everything is out there because it was meant to be there.

And that’s why, when he looks around, he says, ‘Go on. O traveler’. 

Holding on to the strings

She couldn't express her feelings in words. But that wasn't the problem, the problem was that she tried expressing, and she failed every time. He would judge her words, and made conclusions based on them. She loved words, she loved people, and she loved life. He loved thoughts, he loved landscapes, and he loved

imagination. 

They were two different people, deeply in love with each other. But often when you fall in love, you just fall in love. There is no reason. After falling in love with him, she felt that people fall in love with each other’s differences, or was it only her. Oh, he loves adventure, how interesting, I have never had the opportunity to do something adventurous, and I might like it too. Oh she is so bubbly, I’m not like that, I love her eyes, and they twinkle all the time. She would always worry about all the things around her, and he just lived because life is to be lived, with no aim or reason.

She would dance to feel her body move, he would dance because the music would make him groove. They were different people but they were in love with each other’s differences. But love always becomes a little complicated, because with time she couldn't help asking questions: What is that thing which he loves about me? Why is he so careless? He started to compare his love to hi imagination, to the world he had created in his mind. Why is the love so entangling? Why isn't' it like a free bird?

She would get upset, and he would get irritated. She would complain, and he would shout. She would anyway want to forget it, but he would hold on to it. She would stop talking, and he would stop to imagine. The differences they loved, were falling apart. She would no more write, and he would no more play music and take her to his world. She would no more try and express and he would no more tell her stories. She would no more look into his eyes, and he would no more make love to her.

But they were in love, they couldn't leave. He was still there, and she was still here. He still cared, and she would still worry. He would still build stories, and she would still write. But they were scared to communicate. The strings were very weak, they could break any moment. Both of them were holding on to them, they never knew they will break anyway. 

Letter to the Boss!

The mail, that one young female had the balls to mail her boss sometime back. I'm quite impressed, I'm sure you will too! 

Dear Sir,

I have been working with you since past 8 months now, and I’m sad to say that nothing really has inspired me till now. Considering that this is my first full-time job, I have been really depressed and unhappy with the fact that I will be taking almost nothing with me when I will leave this place, which is very unfortunate.

Kindly, don’t take the above sentences in the negative; because those are just to make the whole environment I have been working in with the others a little positive. Everyone sticks to a job, if that interests him/her and inspires/motivates him/her  to learn and improve, but here, I haven’t found much of a motivation, there is nothing different that this workplace has given me, and the little hopes that I have from this place is what is prompting me to write this mail to you.

Firstly, since past 3 months, I have been getting the salary late (for whatever reason it might be) , in-spite of the fact that you know I don’t reside with my family, nor is my family very well to do to feed me and pay my rent and other expenses.

Parents educate their children, so that they can earn and live a independent life, I won’t want to ask my parents for money every month, what’s the point of calling myself a PR Executive if I have to still walk up to someone for money? I hope you understand this well, as you are an independent businessman yourself

Now, this month again, I haven’t received my salary, my house owner is yelling at the top of his voice outside my door each day I return home from office for the rent. My tiffin-wala has recently lost his father, and I have kept him hanging for the money (I’m sure he needs the money more than I or you need it), it gets more depressing, as it does not allow my consciousness to breathe.

Secondly, past 8 months, and I’m still get 13,000/-. I don’t think that is enough for the amount of work I have been doing which includes content, client servicing, Media relations, social media (which I have stopped recently, simply because I’m tired of everything) sometimes helping with the banner, making presentations & going for other meetings. According to me I deserve a raise.

Lastly, 8 months and still no offer letter, requesting you to consider that too.

So I would request you to reconsider employing me here. Timeliness, a Good work environment, organized work, and appreciation is all I’m asking for. And I’m sure my colleagues will agree with all the above. It’s already 10^th today, and unfortunately I haven’t received my salary cheque which will take another 3-4 days to credit.

If you feel I’m not good enough, ask me to leave, I will leave with all my dignity. If you think I have been rude above, I would request you to step in my shoes for a while, and if you think I’m justified, do consider this mail seriously.

The final decision is yours. You can chose to ignore, or act upon this mail, either positively or negatively.

Regards,

A fellow human-being

Oh, so you left your job, what now?

“Oh, so you left your job, what now?” – I have come across this question at-least 12345 times in past one month. “umm uhhh I don’t know, not thought about it”, and then you see raised eyebrows, worried faces, and you-are-good-for-nothing cum you-wasted-your parents-money glares. I don’t get this. Recently I heard an uncle saying, “Why didn't you opt for diploma for your son, He will be doing engineering only no?” I don’t get this.“So you are not working now, why don’t you give those Bank exams?”

I don’t have the words to explain people or my own family that I’m not running behind the money, or behind fame, I’m looking for something that will make me happy, simply happy. ‘Oh but, you will get married one day, and then how will you survive and feed your family?” Why do I have to get married, and why do I have to have a family? Why can’t I just do what I like, get paid enough to take care of my basic needs, and live life my way?

“You don’t have a direction in life, first get some professional degree, make sure you will get a job that will pay you enough and then do what you want, secure your life first” I don’t get this. I’m 21, I have quite some time left in my life, which I can live on my own, without worrying about the family, and marriage etc. Why can’t I live it my way? All our lives we run behind securing our lives. I have to study because I have to earn, I have to earn because I have a family, I have a family, now I need to earn a little more, now I have to educate my children, get them married, and die peacefully, and dying peacefully needs money, eh?

Sitting at home, surfing on internet, listening to some music, having no job in hand is such a big deal. Why can’t I sit at home doing nothing for a while? I’m taking up a fellowship for two years. I’m doing this because I love this. But you studied advertising, why do you want to teach now? Oh so you want to be a teacher, why don’t you do B.Ed then? I want to teach for a while. I want to teach because I want to be a part of this particular fellowship, or this particular movement. I want to teach but that’s not the only thing I want to do. So you can do this later in life, first secure your life, get a proper degree, which will give you a permanent job……. But I don’t want to teach later, I might not want to teach later, I might not feel like doing it later, I’m not dying, I can study all my life. Right now I want to do what I can do, something that will make me happy, something that will give a satisfaction

Please stop advising, it is doing no good. It will either discourage me or make me like everyone else. I want to be me, and I want to be happy and money definitely can’t keep me happy for long.