We are terrorized and flattened by trivialities; we are eaten up by nothing.” – Charles Bukowski

“We're all going to die, all of us, what a circus! That alone should make us love each other but it doesn't. We are terrorized and flattened by trivialities; we are eaten up by nothing.” – Charles Bukowski

For years she believed what society told her. She kept learning looking at the actions of those around her. She was just another product of the society’s inability of reasoning and fake love. She grew up thinking love was not just about giving unconditionally but there were any ifs and buts to it.

She was put into a new world for a few weeks. She was told everything she could never believe. She could not accept anything for a long time. And when she did, she wasn’t aware of it as it was a very unconscious effort. Love and gratitude and the concept of Seva, somehow touched her. Maybe she always believed in those, but the society suppressed those feelings and forced the feeling of hatred and selfishness on her. She was in peace. She couldn’t involve herself in so much love, but looking at as a observer, gave her a lot of peace. She was happy to stand in the audience, without moving an inch and look at those on the stage, genuinely loving each other.

Peace does not last forever. She was sent back to the world she belonged to, to impart the things she had learnt on some tiny souls. She was confident; she was excited, she was glad she would be able to be the change. The first thing, after she entered the world of hatred and selfish gains, was mind your own business or you won’t be happy. People will take advantage of your kindness and use you. Was it that easy for people to take your advantage in this universe? When you help others, do you do that to receive something significant from them? Or is the satisfaction you get of helping others enough? The person you are helping, are you giving that person one more chance to be selfish or you are doing it because it makes it easier for the other person, or maybe you are doing it because it gives you some kind of satisfaction. Does the last reason say that you are selfish?

I leave it open for you all, to think, to question, to explain to justify. She is confused, she is lost, she is on a path where such questions will arise. She is strong, she will surpass, but she feels she won’t find the answers ever.