Needs and Wants

“What is the point of this discussion?” I asked my mom in anger as the discussion on whether financial independence is a primary or a secondary quality in a potential groom. She obviously is of an opinion that it is very important for a successful marriage, but is it really that important? No, before you start guessing the background of my mother, let me tell you she comes from a well-educated, open-minded (as cliched as it may sound) Sindhi family, so much so that she was married off to a Gujarati boy very happily in the early 90s after dating him for good 7 years.

I don’t deny that money is important, but does that mean you can compromise on the understanding. I have seen couples earning lakhs together and yet so unhappy. Does money decide your happiness? She argues, you cannot knowingly jump into the fire. But maybe knowingly jumping will hurt a little lesser than getting a shock later. If there is no emotional attachment, no understanding, how do you think will you ever be able to earn to be happy? Earning money isn't easy, why? Because most of us don’t earn to live, we earn to survive, we earn because of a lot of external reasons. Society, People, Luxury, Peer pressure etc. And then we call this HAPPINESS. What are we really confused about? Definition of money, definition of earnings or definition of happiness? I wonder, as I think about all that I hear each day. Is being materialistic a cool thing these days? Why is there such a wide gap between poor and rich? Because we have created that rift, right? Poverty is when you can’t afford the basic things in life, and rich is when you can afford everything in life. But do we really need everything? NEED? Maybe our WANTS have taken over our happiness. We look for happiness in that one dinner we spend on in a luxurious hotel and check-in to show the world. We look for happiness in choosing to travel by flight where we can easily travel by train. We look for happiness when we buy imported cookies instead of those Parle-G biscuits. I don’t say, all this is bad. It sure isn’t but do these things decide how happy we are? They don’t. I don’t know how people without all these comforts of life survive but the belief that we will survive and remain happy without all these temporary things is real happiness. 

Lost and found

She hated herself. She hated herself for those scars, for loss of people, for pain, for all that added to her confusion, for the organization she worked for, for little things that affected her. She hated herself for her heart, her head and her body. She hated herself because she couldn't love enough or because she loved too much.

Today, as she looks back she has fallen in love with that hate. Hating something, someone is easier than hating you. She does not remember when she suddenly changed, or maybe her thoughts changed. Maybe she was destined to change, but she does not believe in destiny. What was that, that changed her? She fails to get an answer to that, but it does not matter anymore. She needed a motivation, she needed appreciation, she needed respect, and she needed to know that she is absolutely amazing. Sometimes, all you need in life is to be reminded how awesome you are. How your existence is important to someone somewhere somehow. And more often, you won’t believe it when someone who loves you says that. Maybe, maybe because we take our close ones for granted.  

She was a storm, both in and out. And she made it evident almost every time. Today she looks back and realizes she is as calm as those books that speak to you in a way no-one but only you will understand. She loves, and at the same time expects little. She dances, and her feet do not get tired. She sings, even if she knows her voice is not heard. She reads, without the fear of losing interest. She looks up in the polluted sky and finds exactly the stars that are not visible to the other million people. She knows that there is something beautiful is in her that has made her what she is today. She looks back often, just to find out what, what has made her this in a matter of 9 months. Has 2014 brought luck, but the very thought of luck makes her sulk. It isn't luck, it’s something else, self-realization? Yes, maybe.

Sometimes, your thoughts are a hurdle in discovering yourself. Sometimes, you don’t know how you are different from others. Sometimes you idolize someone so much that you want to be them. And then life brings you here, where your thoughts change, your discoveries are immense, you accept that you aren't one of those, and you start idolizing yourself. And from there you rise up, in yourself. You don’t need any more external appreciation, or any more external motivation or any more external respect to be yourself. Because you now believe in yourself, and automatically you start believing in life, in humanity. 

When I look around, I see so much happiness

‘When I look around, I see so much pain’, she thought to herself. Her purpose before taking the big decision of applying to Teach For India was to do something for the humanity.

And now: ‘When I look around, I see so much happiness’, she thought to herself. Her purpose is a little clearer now. She is here to do something for the humanity. That something is giving some comfort, some happiness, some love.

No, those kids with broken homes, with small desires, being beaten up every day, walking to school alone, they do not need sympathy, they do not need your money, your gifts, they need safe environment, they need fun, they need happiness, they need love. Give them just a hug and they will hug you every day. Share your tiffin with them, and see the pride in their eyes. Give them small little star stickers, and they will treasure it for life.

No, my work is not difficult. I love kids, I love humanity, I love simplicity. And no, I wasn't born with all this, I came to be this over time. When that one kid in your class, who would sit quite, wouldn't share, eat her tiffin alone, comes to you one fine day with a packet of star shaped candies and says “Didi this is for you, no-one gives you stars no”, you can’t help but love your work. When that one kid honestly raises his hands, when you ask the class, who does not like didi, you know they feel safe in your class.

In past 3 months, more than anyone, I have come to discover myself. I have come to being happy, patient, loving and kind. All the philosophical stuff suddenly makes sense to me now. How much we complain, how much we cry, how irritated we really are, give it a thought.

No, I am not doing any social work. I’m getting paid for it. I love teaching, this is an amazing experience and this is leadership program, which helps me become a leader. But now all this is secondary. I love my work, I love my kids, and I’m here to make a difference. Difference in the life of others and myself.

Therefore, wander!

Since past several months, I have this sudden urge to travel, travel as much as I can, as much as I can manage. And surprisingly I have been coming across a lot of blogposts, articles, stories about travel. Recently I read an amazing article written by Dileep Padgaonkar, in a weekly news-magazine, and it just filled me up with more enthusiasm.

Lord Indra- well-known God in Rig-Veda, is known as the protector of travelers. In Aitareya Brahmana, he says to a young man named Rohita, "There is no happiness for him who does not travel, Rohita! Thus we have learnt. Living in the society of men, the best man becomes is a sinner. Therefore, Wander! The feet of the wanderer are like the flower, his soul is growing and reaping fruit, and all his sins are destroyed by his fatigue in wandering. Therefore, wander! He who is sitting, his fortune too sits, it rises when he rises, it sleeps when he sleeps, it moves when he moves. Therefore, wander!"

I couldn't agree more. Whats the point in staying at one place forever? It's like a frog in a well, you never really come out, and till you don't dare to come out, you don't know the possibilities of the world. I believe that you rot, when you stay at one place forever. Your brain starts rusting, and you become someone that people make you, not someone you can be. There are less risks, less adventure, and less discoveries. There is nothing that you don't know about your area, you almost know everything there, know most of the people, there isn't much challenge in making new friends, meeting new people. You have a life, but the constant updating of yourself is missing.

Wander, because your life is a gift, and you need to constantly upgrade the gift. You would want to learn to live their way, learn to eat their way, learn to talk their way, and even learn to live their way. Wander, because, your brain needs new food, your heart needs new friends, your body needs new air.Wander, because risks are adventurous, because your brain needs some exercise, because there is joy, because the happiness of 'discovering places yourself' is more than 'I know it all'. Wander, because you don't want to rust and rot, because moving means growing, because it is the best part of learning, because knowledge and experience are directly proportional, because you sin when you stay at one place forever, because traveling is satisfying, the feeling is orgasmic.

If you still don't agree, or do not relate with the feeling, I will quote Lord Indra once again here, because he puts the idea perfectly:  "There is no happiness for him who does not travel, Rohita! Thus we have learnt. Living in the society of men, the best man becomes is a sinner. Therefore, Wander! The feet of the wanderer are like the flower, his soul is growing and reaping fruit, and all his sins are destroyed by his fatigue in wandering. Therefore, wander! He who is sitting, his fortune too sits, it rises when he rises, it sleeps when he sleeps, it moves when he moves. Therefore, wander!"

She has conquered herself. Finally.

As she sat and gaze outside the window, in the midnight, she saw the city lit up with lights, she was hearing the beats of the music playing in the background, her mind was dancing on those beats, and she realized something has affected her so strongly, after a really long time. Something, she didn't know what, but it had completely changed her perspective about everything. Something had slowly stepped on all the negativity and crushed it in a way that she saw no trace of it to come to life again. Something, that she did not know if exists, had arrived, late, but so early that it felt this is the right time to live and dream, hope and walk on the perfectly right path.

She saw the world in front of her, lit up with lights, she could see life in each of those windows, and she wanted to go out there, after she was done enjoying in here, to explore in those lights. As the music changes its pace, as it changes its notes, as it changes its beats, the world she saw went upside down, and she felt the power inside her, to control her world. There was energy, she didn't know. It was creepy, but as soon as it touched her skin, she felt empowered.

The practical her had vanished, and here she stood, unable to believe herself, unable to come to terms with the happiness that exists inside her. She smiled and looked around, and every person she looked at made her feel happier, she saw the world lit up in front of her. She did not bother to understand what had affected her, because whatever it was, it was powerful, and she was confident that it will only bring positivity. She was standing at a point, where she could feel the stability that had arrived. She had left her past far behind, and she was walking ahead, with no trace of regret, just smiling to herself, relating her life to all the things around, making it into a surreal movie.

Her mind was her slave now, she had the remote-control of her emotions in her hand, and she exactly knew where her life was heading. She had conquered herself!

The memories came whirling around like a cyclone

All the memories whirling around like a cyclone. She yells on the top of her voice, but she is not able to hear her own voice. She puts her hands on her ears, and wants the screeching to stop, but it just does not. She goes blank the other moment, with everything around coming to a standstill. She murmurs something to herself, but her voice refuses to be heard. She bangs her head to the wall, and suddenly the memories come flooding in: He holding her hand, and whispering into her ears, “I will never leave you”. Tears roll down her eyes, but the smile does not leave her lips. She is happy because he had promised to stay true to her; he did not leave her side, even when everything had lost its meaning.

Everything was repeating, when she least wanted it to repeat. He was back, standing right front of her in disguise. She started getting carried away in the sea of love, she had no clue it would hit her so hard one day. There was so much similarity to everything, so much so that she hated it, but she had offered the remote control of her emotions to someone already. She was being controlled and she had no clue what was happening to her. Emotions were rushing down her veins, and she could feel them shiver. She wanted to break free and hug herself, for she was the only one she trusted the most, yet she could feel love and hate contradicting each other every moment.

Something came crashing down outside the window, and she woke from her dream. She put her hands on her heart, and felt her heart beating really fast, was it just a dream? Empty house, fan making some noise, she stepped down on the floor, it was cold, her body refused to move. She wanted some warmth, a warm hug could do wonders, but she was scared, one warm hug could owe her entire life. And then the knock on the door, memories wouldn’t let her alone.

He/She does not care enough? Keep Calm & Love Yourself

You will let someone, who does not care enough to decide foryour life. What do you usually do when you wake up in the morning? Look for your phone? Hope that, the person you consider special must have messaged, to say sorry for something that happened last night, or a week back, or to tell you how much you mean to him, or that he dreamt about you? Till how long will you let someone else define your happiness?

You are in your 20s; you have at least 30, or say 35 more years to go. You know right, how long that is? Will you want to spend all your life behind that one person who does not care enough?

Don’t you miss being a child? As a child you got up in the morning, looking outside the window, staring at the sun, packing for an adventurous day at school, learning, playing, and talking all day. Coming back tired, looking forward to yummy food & may be your favourite cartoon. Don’t you miss that instant happy sleep, and waking up directly the next morning?

Who says you can’t cope up with this thing called, ‘quarter-life crisis’?  Wake up, stare at the sun, let your phone be there, beeping all the time. The messages can wait, but not your life.

Walk up to someone who has been there always, who cares, and is within the reach, right in front of you, pass a smile. No such person in your life? I’m sure you own a mirror at least.

Make yourself breakfast. Delicious- compliment yourself, pack some and share with the people at work. Super-bad, curse yourself and promise to do better the next time. Get on your feet and go to the work with the same innocence you walked to school each day.

I’m sure you don’t want to end up graying your hair so soon. Look there, a lot of people, expect a lot from you, work harder, and earn yourself some experience that counts. Don’t like your job? Quit. Risk is a part of life. Find a new one, or simply work on yourself, learning never stops. Start loving yourself.

Life is very short, and yes, you don’t want to waste it onsomeone who doesn’t care enough. Create your own identity.

Inequality also begins at home

Since past several months, something has been constantly disturbing me. I have tried to put it down here; I don’t know how you guys will perceive it. Views, opinions are welcome in the form of comments.

For instance, there are two siblings, one being a boy and the other being the girl. Both are in their 20s, both of them have a wish, maybe to buy something expensive, of course a middle class cannot afford to spend on both the things in the same month, and one of them will have to wait. What my questions is, often why is a girl made to wait? Why can’t a father or a mother ask the boy to adjust, and wait?

Another instance, both of them are earning, the girl wants to spend her salary on her wish, but she isn’t allowed to do so. Why? That money has to be saved for your marriage. It is a saving. Sounds sensible, agreed, but then when the boy earns, he goes straight to Dominoes, spends as much as he wants, comes back home, and says he wants to buy something from his salary this month. Parents will argue, try and explain him that he should not spend on something not essential, but in the end, give up, and let him do what he wants to.

At the same time I have seen a lot of families where the scenario is balanced or exactly opposite but most of the times, it is the same story mentioned above.  What I have narrated above is just an example, a lot of such incidences happen every day.

I’m lucky enough to have parents who since I was kid, always said, “marriage? Forget that, earn enough for yourself, learn to manage our expenses yourself, and then we will get your married to someone you want to get married to”. I have been staying away from home since 5 years now, but even today, when my mom has to take a decision regarding my brother, his life, his career, anything, I’m called for my opinion and views. My brother demanded that he should be allowed to ride my scooty. My Dad clearly stated, “Ruchika is coming next week, if she allows you to use it, you very well can”, and no my brother did not feel insulted, in fact he was confident enough that I will never say no to him. This does not mean, the boys in my family aren’t important. What is important is that, the sister is elder, and she has all the rights to decide for her brother just like his mother or father.

There is no high or low. There has to equality. There has to be logic. There has to be respect for every individual. If you treat your daughter second, and your son first, then expect the same behavior from your son for his wife and his daughter. The same behavior will be passed from generation to generation, and a woman will never come out of the social problems she has been facing since ages.

Don't walk away

It was just another day; they had not spoken properly for a week now. And in that one week, her life had gone upside down. She had taken such decisions of her life, for which he was responsible equally, but was not there for her.

Some two months back something had gone terribly wrong with her, and he was right there, besides her, helping her out of it. But all that was flushed down the drain now. What is the point now? He isn't there for her throughout, he left her midway. She had to face it alone, and he made it worse, because now she had to start from the beginning, learn to stand for herself, and stop hoping he would come for her.

Last one year was frustrating for both, yet she stood for him every time, and he wouldn't walk away forever. They both tried hard to make it work, but unfortunately he lost his patience and walked away, promising he would never return back, and warning her to stay away from him. And coincidently it happened when she needed him the most, she went through the trauma all alone, without putting him in trouble, or creating a fuss out of it.

He returned back, a week later, the same day she emerged victorious in moving out of him, and creating a whole new identity for herself in her own mind. He returned and it wasn't very long since he had left, so she fell for him, yet again.

It is just another day today; they haven’t spoken properly since three days now. He says he will, but he said that a day back too. He says he will call, but she has a meeting to attend. He says he will talk, but what about her work. Of course you don’t disturb someone when he/she is at work. And of course you don’t irritate someone, when he/she is having fun with friends. She understands, but what about her time.

It isn't that important that in a relationship you communicate daily. But when the need arises, you do need to communicate. And for a matter of fact, communication can never be one-sided. It has to be two-sided. Moody she understands, Space she understands, but ignorance for the one you have loved so dearly that you have kept giving her chances, she doesn't understand.

It’s time to move away, when the value decreases, priorities change, when standing on the road and talking to random someone becomes more important the person waiting to hear from you.

The world is a small place, someone somewhere someday would take it all away from you, you might never regret it, sit there and say, ‘what has to be yours, will be yours’ but remember, earning something, and treasuring it needs efforts.

Happiness is You

Love never dies. Hope is constant. Wish is unavoidable. Life isn't perfect. All that can be altered is you.

Most of our life seems messed up when we expect it to be altered, to be better, to be near to perfection, to be like the way we would like it. But happiness could never be defined, and if someone did define happiness, it is nothing but you.

All of this seems so irrational, when you apply it in your life. You still expect, you still want the other to make you smile; you still desperately want to be happy. Happiness is all everyone wants. But what gives one the desired happiness differs.

Sometimes you give-up relying on others for that smile, but you still expect people not to ruin that smile, or not to be the reason for your sorrow. So again you are relying on others for your own happiness.

Sometimes you just cling on to people, because sometime in life they were the reason for your happiness, they still are, or maybe not, but we tend to expect them to keep us happy. So again your happiness is in hands of someone else, who has defined happiness for himself in a different way then you.

Happiness is love for yourself, love for your own strengths, your weaknesses. It is the confidence, the patience, the kindness you possess, for yourself.

Loving yourself gives you the unconditional happiness and the strength to love the other.

Still I would say Happiness is over-rated. Isn't being sad also satisfying sometimes. How many times did you cry and cry and then slept like a baby? We will come to that some time later.  

On your Birthday: A Virtual Gift from me to you! XOXO

As much as my memory goes, It was July 2010, when I first met this really TINY (yes yes tiny), cute female who turned out to be one of my closest friends over the years. This Blogpost is dedicated to those 4 years (well, almost) of my life that I spent with she being incredibly huge part of. 

To Shreya,
My love (No, I am not a gay)

Lets start this here, I'm sure you will kill me for this picture, but I'm also sure you understand the importance of this really sad picture of us. I think this is when we actually started to talk so much, all about You, Me, and how very much LIBRANS we are! ummm...yes, yes, PROUD LIBRANS!!!

BWHAHAAHA, Yes you have turned out to be a sex-bomb over the years! *Wink Wink*

Not many would understand the relationship between us. We aren't the gooey mushy kind of friends, we don't have pyjama parties, we aren't insecure about sharing our friends, and we don't discuss lipsticks (I don't). We are unpredictably best friends whenever it is convenient for us, and rest of the times we prefer not to bother each other, still care. You know right? That I love you! 

I look like your mom here!!!! 

The pretty, tiny girl that you are, your smile is so contagious that there have been times in college when I used to simply keep looking at you, or get jealous of that curve on your face (sounds, creepy right? confessions confessions!) You have always been a lady, who is stunning and strong at the same time. 

ahem ahem!

For every time that we have said 'pakk raha hai yaar', for all the mood swings, for those one or two cold wars we have had, for all that libran talks, for every time we sat and cribbed about our lives, for every time we discussed how bloody giving we are, all said at once, 'you are someone I would never imagine to be freinds, for looking at you, I'm so much reminded of myself, and till today I have remained confused about if I like you or hate the similarities between us' (confused us forever you know)

This incredibly amazing picture! 

Those times when I wan't very fat, and you were a cute little ball (forgive me for the description) and today, when I'm a fatass and you are a sex bomb, I love it all, You would say 'pakka mat yaar, u r soooo pretty', yaaa maybe, but still please don't you deny the fact that I'm FAT now! but I love myself because you know we are Librans, we can't hate us (umm...we can actually)

Not just Jazz by the bay (show-off)

We can ever get tired of complaining, We can fake the smile perfectly, hold on to the straight face, ignore when we want, get attached and detached pretty easily (provided the person opposite doesn't hold any grudge), love unconditionally, crib about life, yet be so lively. Dance and cry uncontrollably , love and hate ourselves at the same time. We are the perfect example of lil drama and lots and lots of pin straight life (PIN STRAIGHT). We are so cool and also so sad at the same fucking time!

With love and all the weirdness!

Yes, I will always be right here, waiting to hear to your complains, here to make you feel good about yourself, here to make you smile when low, here to make imaginary plans and enjoy the temporary excitement!!!!! And I'm here to get admitted with you on the bed next to you when we both suffer from Anxiety-induced blood clot!!!

And yesh, you will always be that tiny, pretty, completely mad friend, And we will always keep hogging on all the sweets in the world (more of Gulab Jamuns) and so much fish!!!! I love you as much as you love Gulab Jamun & Dance combined together!!!

Love,
Your Twin Libran!
XOXO

Now give me this!!!!!

Birthday Post - I'm feeling Lucky

Some 21 years back, a really beautiful lady was 9 months pregnant, and was out with the love of her life, to watch the colourful and musical festival of Navratri on the streets of Ghatkopar, when she started craving for an ice cream. So the obedient husband, his best friend and the lady went to a nearby restaurant to have some ice cream, apparently the ice cream was called 'gadbad ghotala', and suddenly she realised that the baby inside her tummy wanted to desperately come out and dance to the tunes of the garba music! That was 27th September 1992, and the baby was successful in coming in this world on the 28th of September 1992.

 Till date, Navratri has been her favourite festival, and garba her favourite dance form. Unlike most of the families in India, this particular family was looking forward to a girl child, and their happiness knew no bounds today, 21 years back. It is 21 years since that day, and till today they have been proud to have, not one, but 3 beautiful girls in their family.

 Today on my 21st b'day, I feel lucky to be able to pick up my phone, understand, and be able to write about my feelings. I feel lucky to know my Birth Date. I feel lucky that all my 21 birthdays I had a cake to cut, I had an opportunity to celebrate it. In spite of being a girl child, In spite of being a women, In spite of coming from a not-so-modern family. I Feel lucky to have a FAMILY.

Two Different people, Two different perspectives!

He decided to buy it, and she was happy, because she always wanted it, but could never buy it. They researched around it day in and day out. After a lot of research he canned the plan of buying it at all. That made her sad, but never mind, she would convince him someday, she convinced herself.

One afternoon, suddenly he wanted to buy it again. She smiled to herself, she was successful. But she never knew there was a lot to come. The research started again, and this time she had to convince him to buy what she wanted to always buy, and yes yet again, she won.

It was bought, she was happy, he was happy too, finally something they both loved, wanted was theirs. He loved to click and she loved getting clicked. He clicked her with his newly bought camera. She was the first one to get clicked with his brand new camera and the happiness knew no bounds.

Some days back she wanted the camera, just, because she wanted to click, because she wanted to explore, because suddenly she felt like she could click, she asked him for it. He did not refuse, but forgot. He forgets a lot of things that she says, because there are other important things to remember, Or because he has a habit of forgetting things. She ignored.

One fine day, happiness was around the corner, both were busy with their smart phones and then she looked at the screen of his phone. He was talking to his best friend who is one of the most important parts of his life. And she realized that he is selling it off for another one.

He felt bad that he hadn't told her, but he hadn't told her because he wanted to surprise her with the new one. That is so sweet, and that made her happy from the inside, but what distressed her was that she was attached to the old one, she wanted to see it, touch it, yes he owned it, but wasn't she equally a owner, or maybe not. She loved it, it was her first one, their first one, and she wished to see it. But he had a plan, a plan to surprise her, to see that smile on her face, is it right to ask him about this plan, was it right to ask him to get the old one back so that she could bid it a goodbye.

Whose mistake is it? Who has to compromise/understand/adjust? Who should let it go, and embrace the happiness for the other? 

Last Evening

The kind of a girl I am, I cannot be alone, not even for a moment, except when I am depressed, or when there is no other option, but to be alone. Last evening, after office I decided to go shopping, all by myself. The deciding part itself took like an hour, and then accepting the fact that I was going alone, took another hour. Even offered my colleague to accompany me, but then she refused, and, I finally ended up going out alone.

I have my own weird reasons of not going alone somewhere out, I have never really been alone, always been indecisive and  always had this odd feeling of roaming around all alone, plus my talkative nature just can’t stay quiet, especially when I am somewhere out, and get excited about anything.  Now let’s get back to last evening, when I dared to step out alone, entered a mall alone, and bought things all alone, with much confusion and saved a lot of time and also saved a lot of money.

And before I tell you how I am feeling, right now, while writing this piece of blog post, let me clear that I didn’t go shopping for clothes or accessories or any girly stuff. I went shopping for stationary. Yes, you heard it right stationary. 

So I was sitting at my office, with not much work, and I with no mood to either read or write or surf on the internet, so I sat in front of my desktop, staring into infinity and thinking about random things (one of favorite pastimes at work) and somehow it struck me that nothing is making me cheerful at that particular moment, and I don’t want to go back home and stare at the wall, so I an idea struck me that I should go shopping, shopping for something productive.

 Now how is stationary productive? I have always been really fascinated with painting, sketching, drawing or whatever form of art you call it. And some 2-3 months back, my grandfather had given me an advice that I should spend some part of my salary to buy something that will increase my credibility and add to my talent. So I decided to buy a book, and guess what I ended up buying Paints, and sketch book, and sketch pens, and pencils and paint brushes and so many more things. And then I came back home, and kept staring at it like a baby, you know every year in school, when your parents used to buy you those new books, and pens, and pencils, and bags, and you used to be so excited about everything, that was how excited and happy I was after buying those small, productive things.

And I wrote this whole thing, just because I had to express my happiness somewhere and write how easy it is to shop alone. Next time when I ask anyone to come to shop along with me please remind me this incident. I would really appreciate and treat that person with a pastry.