Talk about Rape!

Have been reading a lot about ‘Rapes’ a lot these days. Every Tom, Dick and Harry has something to say about it. Nobody realizes that talking, tweeting, assuming, writing, debating is very easy, but actually going through the agony, the pain, the disgust, the whole fucking situation (during and after rape) is pathetic, be it a attempt to rape or even rape. Most of us, girls, have gone through an attempt to rape kind of a situation once, or several times in our lives. Stares, touching at all the wrong places, groping, passing lewd comments, is so common that we have started considering it us a part of our lives. When I sit and write this piece, I go back to all the situations I have gone through in the 21 years of my life, since the day I was born. I want to collapse and die right here, not because I'm ashamed or disgusted but because I ignored all of those really disgusting attempts of various men around me, just like that, instead of raising my voice or stabbing them to death.

 People are talking about the rapes going unreported, well, try going to the police, or even your own parents or friends, and narrate what, how, where, when the rape happened to you, you will realize how much courage and determination you need for that. It is easier to sit and shout, get to action, and then go debate in the media. Every person, or rather every girl has two personalities. We are moulded into two different people. One is full of emotions, be it anger, shame, or love, and the other is the practical one. The first is our natural self, which would want to revenge, teach someone a lesson, love a person no matter what, be kind, or extremely rude, and the second one is completely made-up, the one that the society will approve off. Usually the second one is stronger, and forces the girl to shut up in the fear of the society, which includes her family and closest of friends.

Punishment? Stricter Laws? Government Action? Really? All of these are going to help? No, they won’t help, because the Rapists don’t really care. It’s the urge that they care about (no matter how disgusting it sounds) and you can’t reason that out. What they care about is the fun, they wouldn't think about the consequences before committing the crime, they don’t have enough time, the urge, and the girl both will get away if they consider any kind of thinking before committing the crime. You say that all these heinous rape cases being reported by the media will stop people from committing this crime? All this tweeting, debating on national televisions, forming an opinion, defining rape is going to help? No, it is making it worse. I have seen guys talking about rape, discussing about it and laughing, because it is no more a crime, but a fad, a trend, if you are a part of a rape you are cool, you are on TV, people are talking about you, after all any publicity is good, isn't it? Isn't that what we people say, isn't that what media believes?

 Stop it for God’s sake, Since the Mumbai Rape Case happened all that I have been seeing in some of the leading newspapers is RAPES, Rapes all over India suddenly being reported, editorials full of what is wrong and what is right, articles about how a girl should ensure her safety, all kinds of does and don’ts. All of this isn't doing any good, women will still shy away and not report rapes, Men will still commit the crime, there is no end to it, unless we decide to change the way we think, unless we change our belief system, and that is a pretty long process, till then at least stop this sudden love towards preventing rape, only when the crime is committed and reported, and then forget about it, till some other group of men commit the crime again, for the much needed attention, for fun, and for the instant fame.

She & Her & Some Hope

She is a girl, fearless girl, who has been brought up with immense love and care. Her family has given her freedom, made her into an independent women, given her everything she needed, and moulded her into a responsible women.  In spite of being brought up in a small town, she hasn't been any different from her other counterparts. She stepped into Mumbai, to live on her own, when she was just 15.

Today she is a 21 year old woman, and when she hears about these rapes around the country, one feeling that haunts her is Anger. She is not scared; being scared is not going to help. Telling her story will only make people point fingers at her. Raising her voice will get her all the more stares and challenging the rules set up for a woman of this country will only increase her chances of getting raped.

Every morning when she walks down the road, there is a feeling that someone is constantly following her, that someone has his eye constantly at her.  But she ignores them all, walks down the road anyway, head held high, staying alert. Sometimes she sits alone and cries, cries for her freedom, cries for some safety, cries because her male counterparts are safe, cries because she is a girl, but then she goes off to sleep, because reasoning has never helped in this country. 

A gang rape, which came under the limelight, makes the people hurl abuses at the government, the police, and the country. What about those which go unnoticed each day? And forget about the rape, the same people raising their voices on the social networking sites, will discuss about how the girl will spend her life. Traumatized for sure, but she isn't dead, she can lead a normal life, if you let her lead one. She doesn't mind saying this, that rape is over-rated, yes it is OVER-RATED, because we don’t stop giving sympathy, no, the victim does not need sympathy, she needs hope.

She will live in Mumbai, will not leave India, she will have the same respect for men in her country, but she will have no trust. She will go out, meet her friends, might as well come late at night, and will always know that every moment there is chance of getting molested, of getting raped. The memories won’t stop haunting her; in fact she will go through the same feeling, every time women will be raped in India. She will lead a normal life, but will know that there won’t be a moment when she will be safe. She will continue to live on her own, head strong, with little hope, that one day she will be safe, and till she gets to see that one day, she has to live, live with the memories, live with the hope.

Priorities

“Priorities, Priorities, they define your life. 

Hurt you, break you, and claim your sleep.

Yes, time heals everything, yet the effect is so deep, it leaves a scar. 

Priorities, Priorities, they define your life”